Monday, June 28, 2010

Yoga Love

Sunday (after book club, a beyond-awful 2-mile-that-was-supposed-to-be-5-mile-run, gardening and grocery shopping) I giddily packed up my Intention Notebook and hit the road for Sandskirt* class.  I was mentally beat and physically tired, but I am so intrigued by this whole yoga exploration that I was totally excited ... and nervous.  I think I have mentioned previously that I am pretty new to this whole yoga thing and at Sanskrit class, generally, I am pretty sure that I am the only non-instructor there.  But I do my best to keep up.  This class went better than the last one - the last class I had no idea what was going on. The actual words and concepts that were being discussed and taught were incredibly beyond me.  But, being the good student I am, I wrote down all the words I didn't know, went home and looked them up in Light on Yoga: The Bible of Modern Yoga..., did my 'homework' of practicing Sanskrit vowels (among other things) and went to my second class feeling much more confident.  Still clueless but at least not utterly clueless.  I did not suddenly rock the Sanskrit lesson but I was comfortable and had a great experience.

 After my first class Bill asked me why I was taking Sanskrit.  I was frustrated with myself because I could not articulate why I was going or why it was important or what my ultimate goal was.  I am a goal kind of girl so this was odd ... and uncomfortable.  I was sacrificing part of a day off - a SUNDAY - and I had no idea why.  But it was important to me.  Why?

I have always had a plan.  Always.  I've set a goal, made a plan, and achieved that goal.   This is how I have lived my life.  Yoga is different.  I feel yoga not plan it.  There is no goal except to learn more, experience more.  Achieve more? I suppose that is a side effect.

Yoga is many things beyond the physical practice.  I will not pretend to know all that it is ... but it is spiritual and it is physical and it is mental.  If you are practicing the physical aspect, I think that is great.  If you have been practicing long enough that you have started to wonder what else there is, then that is fantastic.  That is where I am at - the fantastic yoga point.  Yoga Journal this month has a great article about how discovering yoga is like falling in love.  At first you are skeptical, taking it slow.  But then you are in head first.  You can't think about anything else.  You are seeking more, trying to analyze and define your relationship... it is all exciting and outlined in bright, bold colors.  That, for me right now, is the fantastic yoga point.  I am having a love affair with the entire practice and need more all the time.  Eventually this will wane into a comfort zone where yoga is a happy, comfy facet of my everyday life.  But right now, it is all-consuming.  And that is why I go to Sanskrit class.  I'm not sure why I am there but Yoga is there and so I go ... to be with my Yoga.

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